Judges pick plain pudding out of far tastier fare

Don't you just love a good competition? I do! I like to see the end product that comes from such intense pressure. It is that breaking point where everything either rolls downhill into a spectacular finish or falls apart just before the summit and tumbles back down bringing the whole proverbial croquembouche with it, but I know that there are cheats out there just waiting to spoil my fun and spoil it they did. A certain reality TV series which we will call 'Super Cook' played with my confidence not only in terms of television competitions, but also my confidence in the food industry who were willing to sell themselves for a lie and it wasn't subtle.

'Mother Goose', the winner of the first season of Super Cook, presented no better than a first year apprentice chef or dare i say it, a member of the Betty Crocker recipe panel. Week after week tears fell as flambés fizzled, custards curdled and racks over-roasted, but miraculously she was still there as far more talented chefs were told to pack their bags. 'Behind the Scenes' was where we were being told this candidate had won the hearts of notoriously overbearing judges. What was happening behind the scenes was the competitions associated publishing house were scouting for a palatable author to help push the recipe book component of the competition. And who could blame them. The other options were either tiresome or trying, from an experimental Kylie Kwong to a bloated and beer obsessed Matt Moran. The publishers would need someone who reminded its 35ish white woman reader of a domestic kitchen icon.

But it was all here-say and speculation until i got the inside track from some loose lipped food stylists already working on layouts for the coveted recipe book "The person who wins is the one you would least expect." Ie. the person who is the least talented cook. From then on it became achingly obvious that Mother Goose would win this competition and, knowing what i knew, the stops the judges were pulling was like having someone molest your face with rancid butter. "Your base is too thick" several contestants were told when judges barely struggled to cut through to the bottom of their layer cake. Mother Gooses base was so thick that one of the judges had to smash it down on his plate to even make a dent in it. Judges: "Your base is too thick, but it has a nice flavour and texture and we think you've done a really good job." cue the triumphant music sequence. Lies lies lies! Shame!

So you are looking for someone to be the face of an approachable cookbook....fine, but don't case it in a competition about culinary skills when all you really want is a concept pitch. Misleading your audience is one thing, but being so blindingly obvious about it is just shameful and unfair to the viewing public who invested a good portion of both their free time and social time devoted to talking, blogging and bragging about your show. Try that trick again and you may find that their will be no season three for 'Super Cook'